Why Do Dyslexics Struggle With Reading And Spelling And Yet Have A High IQ? by Dyslexia Toby, ©
2014

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The left side of the brain has evolved slightly slower than the right side… the left giving us the ability to decipher such things as the written and, in some part, the spoken word.  This side of the brain is very analytical and linear in its approach to life as a whole… many in education and politics would be linear thinkers and, as a result, it is enormously important in certain areas of employ.

We fill our minds one way or another by gleaning both information and knowledge from others, during our early years to our last breath, through many sources… parents/carers, teachers/educators, family/friends and later in the workplace and personal research through reading, listening, etc.

‘Innate’ is the ability within… we all have the ability to improve by simply building on what we already know about ourselves and the world around us.  Our ability to retain information is in some part down to innate intelligence.

Simply learning a process, be it from early years or as a child/adult, we need to tap in or practice our new skill to increase our personal skill set.  Dyslexics, dyscalculics and many dyspraxics need to practice and very much need to over learn every new skill and indeed all the skills they have already mastered… it’s rather like the guy spinning the plates when one is spinning another is nearly ready to fall, it’s about keeping practising to keep the skill level up.

We need to learn to the style that suits our brains strengths.

The right brain is known to be very much a creative area, its benefits are very much holistic/3D thinking and that is why we tend to be extremely intelligent, even though we struggle with certain left brained skills like reading, writing and learning languages.  Put us in an art or drama class and stand back and watch us fly! We can often leave our left brained counterparts for dead in this environment and for this reason we need to graft all our learning to our stronger right side.

How do we do this?

We need to be taught in a very stimulating multi-sensory/kinaesthetic style that will be retained with greater ease than note taking, be it verbally or visually from the whiteboard.  Students need to feel the subject and engage with it.  We must remember that we survived on this planet for thousands of years, pre reading and writing.  Why?... because we had a very strong right sided problem solving area of the brain.  This makes dyslexics some of the biggest players in business today… the ability to think of alternatives, and look at the situation holistically.

We throw our teachers and, on occasions, our friends and peers due to this innate ability.  If we can turn situations on their head and display an exceptional long term memory, then we must simply be labouring over reading, writing and spelling?  Not so, way off target… they use the left linear side, which is not our best, so we have to think and learn in a different way.  Afford us this and we will surprise many!

We mentioned good long term memory; however our short term suffers through many things including learning style and, as a result… stimulation, during the learning process.

Memory in particular, or working memory, is as mentioned weak in those that are right brained and have problems as comprehension seekers.  Our working memory/recall is one of the main components within the cognitive process.  This function allows the storage of relevant and sometimes non-relevant information for a limited time whilst studying the required skill set. However it’s not just limited to our study programs, we use this in so many activities, including reading, writing and two-way conversations and also in problem solving.

Reading is a great way to improve our short term, working memory and recall as it’s one of few things that require our brain to build text throughout the passage of writing until it creates meaning.  However, the down side is the longer it takes to read (fluency) the more of a struggle it becomes… we can end up reading something and are then unable to recall the story line due to having poor spelling ability and breaking words down to such a degree that all we remember are bits of words and not complete sentences, thus giving a loss of meaning and huge frustration on the part of the reader, especially if the teacher/tutor prompts you for your opinion or input on the book in front of others . It is extremely important to have material available that suits the learner, they have to see a relevance to the subject/book…dyslexics tend to be very factual and their books should reflect this.

 We can therefore state that there is a relationship between working memory, our word recognition, fluency and our knowledge of vocabulary.  So what does this all mean and how can we improve?

 It’s very much like the chicken and the egg… accuracy of speech improves spelling and the better we can spell, the easier it is to read and the faster words are recognised.  This in turn puts less constraint on working memory to access those words and their meanings… giving us far greater retention rates in an area that we would normally struggle with.  It helps to make a story come alive by thinking of you or your friends as the very characters you are reading about (visualisation)… this helps us by stimulating us and this improves our retention of both the written and spoken word.

However, these days we need to be high academic achievers as proving yourself on paper has become a necessary evil for all scholars, so we need that harmonisation between both fact and analysis (our intellect) and demonstrating knowledge through creativity (intelligence)... and we have the later in abundance.  We are very good at improving our skill sets, so contrary to what many believe, we will survive and we can create other skill sets from what we already know.

Dyslexics…

See three dimensionally.

Have great long term memories.

Construct things from visualisation.

Are highly connected to their immediate environment.

Use past images to repeat processes.

Have a higher than normal degree of curiosity.

Are very picture driven (not text or verbal)

Are very kinaesthetic learners.

Are extremely practical and artistic.

Our posts are for guidance only and are put together with the knowledge  of our team and that of others…you are welcome to comment or share our work but please mention the originators of the post

Dyslexia Toby © 2014

Organisational Skill levels of Children with Dyslexia and  DCD (Schools out, a must read) by Dyslexia Toby © 2014

With children who struggle to plan and structure their events, including school, this often stems from weak or non-existent organizational skills. This can lead to incomplete tasks, such as failing to complete homework and other activities. Parents work particularly hard in all they do, but vigilance is key to making sure this is picked up early.

Due to the sheer nature of both Dyslexia and DCD, it is important that we don’t leap to the wrong conclusion and blame our children through the likes of inattention, lethargy or avoidance…for the most part they are not disobedient children, often the contrary. It can be quite difficult for parents and teachers to know if a child is struggling with various tasks due to lack of motivation, poor organization or the inability to organise (multi-tasking) or demonstrate sound time management skills. Children who attempt, but struggle, with set tasks require a structure to enable them to organise events on a daily and weekly basis…it is very important to structure their week and allow very little to get in the way of that structure. It would be so easy for this to all collapse after all your and their hard work. Masking is something girls do very well, boys tend to let the world no they are bother by lack of organisation or they are unable to grasp a new concept.

How can we help our children?

Start by having a structured routine. This will include set times for regular events like homework, household, etc…make this fair by allowing them more time than a child without DCD…give shorter lists of instruction…sand timers are very good for showing children time in a very visual way.

Start with a colour calendar week planner and show the different tasks in colour, as this will be easier to follow…reward good progress!

Ask them if they have followed the schedule/planner and eventually move to allow them to plan in the future…this also takes some of the fear away from new events and holidays, etc.

Have a designated area for putting school books, backpacks, etc.

Make sure they give you things like their lunchbox and ask them if they enjoyed it (this will give you some idea that they have eaten it!)

Keep an eye on the planner and double check that the dates for assignments and trips are correct.

Try a white board in the kitchen for remembering bigger events (visual is good)!

Make mind/road maps on post it notes to help with getting ready for school…use one post it for each task to start with and stick them in bedroom bathroom kitchen etc

Use a jug of time….I find this very good when teaching…take a jug with say one or two litres and divide it by the time you think they need to get ready for school…including maybe some telly.

Homework where possible should reflect the work they are doing in class and not fresh work they have never studied before, why…well dyslexics and those with DCD have slower processing speeds and need to over learn by revisiting their earlier work and going over this two, three or in some cases even four times is required and if they are afforded this extra mile they will retain the information, we see this in our centres and also with our distance learners .

And fill the jug as time passes at the same time telling them how they are eating into their telly or treat time…I do this with the tuition and the bit at the end is playing games time and its amazing how after a period they associate being quicker at everything they get more game time.

Children with both DCD and dyslexia are known for their long term/episodic memories, however short term is the opposite in many cases…if you want your children to improve their organisational skill set a program of support will yield great benefits and will also improve their academic ability.

Memory training is a must for taking this forward and we sell a lot of resources to help improve memory and I would also use these in our own training centre to great effect, you can find them at www,dyslexiadublin.ie

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Our posts are for guidance only and are put together with the knowledge  of our team and that of others…you are welcome to comment or share our work but please mention the originators of the post

Dyslexia Toby © 2014

Apps And Supportive Software (friend or foe?) by Dyslexia Toby © 2014

There are several areas to explore on the question of apps and supportive software.

Many would believe that products are designed to support and improve a child or adult’s ability to read, write and spell more fluently.  Is this true or are they just a crutch that, when removed, put the child or adult back to square one?

If the technology supports the learner, will it be accepted in the class and further still in exams?  Many children with dyslexia or dyspraxia or even those with a specific learning need don’t all have statements and many would not be allocated resource software, as they would not be statemented dyslexic and very few as dyscalculic.  Also, is that software allowed in exams?…it’s often the case that with re-evaluation come Leaving Cert/ A level time, that technology is not always allowed!

Some of the software on offer today has not been evaluated in controlled group situations. This is paramount if we want to ensure students benefit from the possible use of assistive technology.  Much research has been carried out to see if there are such benefits from assistive support, with evidence being sparse to support long term benefits.  How many parents and adult learners are of the belief that this can improve spelling, reading and writing?

Students in a normal class environment are hard to evaluate, as teaching styles and subjects can make a big difference to the learner.  We would need to ask the question of such software… has this been evaluated in a controlled test and what were the outcomes from those tests?…ie. where students in the group with a specific learning need were broken into two groups - one using the support and one not using any support and were the groups of the same academic and not chronological ages?

Children cannot afford to lose any more time when it comes to their education and people need to ask any question they feel is relevant or will benefit for their child… we cannot get months or years down the road to find that we have made a big mistake at this very vital time in their lives.

There are many stories around about some schools being very wary of assistive technology, from coloured lenses/filters/smart pens, through to software.

The other thing to think about is that companies produce assistive technology for profit and, if profits fall, the technology will no longer be produced and you will have to look for replacements, in some cases.  Also, make sure (in the case of software) when committing to a purchase that it can be moved from one machine to another… meltdowns can be avoided if you factor everything in to the equation.

I would say that helping to improve spelling, which in turn improves reading and writing is often the best way forward.

“Assistive and adaptive technology does not "cure" a specific learning disability. These tools compensate rather than remedy” a quote from Washington University.

There is also stigma that needs to be taken into account… how many children would be prepared to use this in class, if it makes them stand out or feel different from their peers?

We are all for anything that will improve someones position, be it in education and on into employment, but it’s worth carrying out your own personal evaluation before you make your decisions… be informed.

NB: this information is for guidance purposes only, you must make your judgements and seeking professional advice is very important.

How Does Our Memory Function… Why’s and How’s (Understanding why we have so much frustration and occasional meltdowns) by  Dyslexia Toby © 2014

 How many memory banks do we have and when do we use them?  What about the functionality of our brain and how can we retain or improve our memory?… lots to look at!

The memory and its functionality is something we should all understand.  With the need to improve comes the need to understand… not dissimilar to a business carrying out a SWAT, we can do the same to see where we can improve or strengthen our memory.

Our memory kicks in the minute we are born (Tabula Rasa)… well almost.  Instinct causes us to breath and cry… however that first touch, glance or taste are the early entries in our memory banks.  Even fear is a memory of the past that comes back and stops us in our tracks… been here before not too sure about this!

All of these are stored (history) and help us build our future.  It is almost like DNA… unique to us. People seem to feel that they know what’s in your head… sorry, only you know that!  Many of us would feel our memory falls short of what we would like it to be, when in fact it’s much better than we believe it to be.

The brain is the most complex part of our body and, without doubt, the nerve centre… without it we are nothing.  It monitors sensors from all over our body and feeds back the signals required to complete every task we do every day.

The brain also determines where the information is stored and how it’s stored… long term, short term, episodic or indeed if it’s worth storing at all.

We have nerve cells that use electrical current to carry information and converge at what’s known as the synaps (loads of neuro transmitters).  There are trillions and they can reshape and constantly evolve… this allows us to look at different ways of doing things or circumnavigating a problem.

Remembering can be from any source… touch, taste, hearing, smell, sight, feeling or indeed a combination of all those things.  It might be a place you have passed before, like a processing plant, your visual kicks in and then your smell completes the link… fear is also based on a visit to the past in our minds.

Our memory is an integral part of the brain and is strengthened very much like a muscle.  Different parts are responsible for different things and the key to development from our early years is stimulation.

We need to combine the areas of the brain to help us complete a task, we would use a different area to physically drive our car and another area for guidance purposes… to get from A to B.  You are not really aware of this and you are making no real demands on your brain… it just happens.  We still cannot say we fully understand the brain and its functions, but through research we know more than we did a few decades ago and this is ongoing research.

The process of memory begins with encoding, and then proceeds to storage and, eventually, retrieval.

We see the world in an encrypted fashion, rather like a series of codes (similar to your personal data on a credit card).  The brain uses a form of decoding known as ‘encoding’… this the very first step in memory creation.  Neurons work the busy highways of the brain carrying data back and forth.

 Most people with a learning need such as dyspraxia or dyslexia have very good long term or episodic memories but quite poor short term memories.

We only rely on our short term memory for storing up to seven things… lets look at dyscalculia for instance,we can store large numbers but we pair them together, like a phone number –‘ 0863500564’ - would be stored as ‘086 35 00 56 4’, for periods of 20 seconds.  Information is then passed onto our long term memory and this is something that all can learn!

Many now worry about dementia or altzeimers often because someone has pointed out that they are forgetting things. With the older age group there is a greater reluctance to exercise many parts of our body including our brain.
If we don't exercise how can we expect to maintain that sharpness and maintain retention. It's hard and nobody will dispute that. We take in so much that by the time we get into our fifties and sixties there is little to stimulate us.

I have taken on the learning of a language and find it difficult as most dyslexics do, to my amazement I am retaining the information, why, because I need it.

Have you ever arrived into a room and forgotten the reason for going in there?  Or maybe about to place an order for food and you can only remember some of the order?… you may have a short term memory problem.  This could be short lived (caused by being ill or stress) or more permanent due to a learning need.

We have several areas that we can move information into - short term or long term storage and this is through our sensory channels… hear/say something, see something, touch something, taste something, smell something… all but our hearing happen very much without us realising.

 Reading this article will hopefully bring clarity and reduce the frustration bought on by a poor memory and also help avoid some of the meltdowns.

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For many, poor memory when it comes to some aspects of learning or life, can be easily forgotten… these are generally areas that hold little interest and therefore become far easier to forget.  One area that never ceases to amaze me is the power of the short and long term memory to retain information through the visual channel and also via kinaesthetically learnt skills.

This is why so many struggle with maths at school, as for the most part it is numbers and not visually stimulating. Try bouncing on an exercise ball or playing maths snap and see the difference… retention is far higher; make shapes out of cereal packet’s to work out lines of symmetry and use a small mirror to reflect the shape…this will be retained for sure.

I was at a teacher training session many moons ago and can still remember some of the names!

The main reason for this lapse or poor short-term memory is often attributed not so much to the ability of the brain to retain such information, but to the ability of the person to engage in a given task.

How many of you go into a venue and are met by a friend who introduces you to a few people and seconds later you have forgotten their names?  It might not necessarily be down to a memory problem.  When you entered the room you might well have been distracted by it’s fine architecture or maybe the decor or an intriguing character in the corner.  You might be nervous and maybe anticipating awkward conversation, or maybe you weren’t listening when you were first introduced.  Try playing a game with yourself by linking each one to a theme or maybe the way they are dressed, like ‘dashing Dan’ or ‘delightful Diana’… this will help you remember names and those other niggling things that are likely to cause awkward moments.

 Train your brain everyday… it’s a large muscle and think what happens to our other muscles that get little use.  Make sure you do things you find stimulating, this will aid retention and short sharp regular bursts of games or activities will help also.

Get in the habit of recording things… I encourage my students to keep a reflective diary… that way you will refresh your mind of the day’s events and names/places, etc. and a calendar for forthcoming events.

A good memory is key to our survival and one of the things that can also affect it is confidence. If you put yourself under pressure… many melt when the word test is mentioned and that can trigger a shutdown in our memory.  This can also cause us to stutter or stammer over an important speech or reading out loud.  Take the praise of others but also praise yourself when you achieve something… this raises confidence and self-esteem, which will also sharpen your memory.

When we pop to the shops, quite often we make a list and this would be something we could introduce into many things we do… you can also try visualising a previous occasion to help you remember something you were going to do, or even help you track something you have lost or misplaced. This is also a handy technique for doing something new.  I remember taking my Motorcycle Test… I know I am dyspraxic and yes, you heard me correct, my Motorcycle Test! During the training I struggled to come up to the expectations of the instructor and was staring at a fail.  After thinking it through, that evening I decided to try a different approach. The next morning I said to the instructor that I wanted to follow him… he was shocked but agreed.  I was able to visualise all I needed to know and that afternoon much to his amazement I passed and passed well!

Episodic memory can hold you back, although it does change over time.  Take food for instance… you could be put off by strong odours like cheeses but when disguised, say in a meal, you could get used to something when buried in a recipe.  I had a dislike for stilton and only had to see it and that was enough!  However I was served it in a meal and ate it no problem and that helps to counter my episodic concerns.  This is the case with many things, like being scared of water… again as I was as a youngster, having an instructor that understands your fear and a one to one session in a quiet pool can ease this slowly or maybe interacting with others can cause flashbacks.

Visual Memory

Visual memory is not dissimilar to our short term memory and has a greater dependency on stimulation…imagine a really nice looking cake in your local bakers, when you tell others about it you re-create the picture image. This part of our memory is very important and can be used to improve other areas that are weak or struggle to retain, this is helped by students with specific learning needs that are taught through a kinaesthetic style of learning. We must always remember that words are abstract to a person with dyslexia, pictures are not.

 The visual short-term memory (VSTM) system effectively retains visual sensory information well after the sensory stimulation has ended. Short-term retention may include the consolidation of visual information into the neural system, in which the information can be manipulated and used to guide our future behavior (Jonides et al., 2008).

I am a very strong believer in short bursts of stimulation through the visual channel to help strengthen short term and long term memory and re-programme the episodic memory (remove or ease fears).

Finally, for those that are that a little bit bothered about growing old and a declining memory…  yes memory problems do tend to increase.  BUT THE GREAT THING IS WE CAN WORK TO MAINTAIN ITS STRENGTH.

The information we provide is the work of our team and also may include the research and words of others is for guidance purposes only and professional advice should always be sought. Dyslexia Toby © 2014

Resources can also play a part in stimulating and improving short term memory.  One such game we stock is the BrainBox range of Memory Training Games.  Have a look at the various titles on our Online Resource Store -  www.dyslexiadublin.ie

Dyspraxia (DCD) & Adult Diagnosis  (do you think you are dyspraxic..revised) Dyslexia Toby © 2014

Diagnosis of dyspraxia in adults is far harder to detect/diagnose… why?  As we go through life we find ways to compensate in many areas that would highlight balance co-ordination and processing and we can avoid tasks that bring about problems for adults with dyspraxia.  Competition is one area… children tend to either get, or want to be included in sport within school time or with friends, adults can avoid sports if they wish and it goes almost unnoticed, as is so often not the case as a child.

Dyspraxia symptoms have been around for a very long time, however diagnosis is relatively new… in the last 15-20 years.  So many born before this time have not had the benefit of a diagnosis and may have been labelled clumsy.

Having an understanding of why we are different is a great help and a huge weight off our shoulders, as we often blame ourselves.

Around 5-6% of the population have some form of dyspraxia, so we are far from alone.

We tend to have greater levels of concentration and are more aware when carrying out tasks that require a greater focus.  We also develop our short term memory over time and this helps improve our processing speed and reaction time.

It’s also important to understand that dyspraxia has a wide spectrum and affects many in a variety of ways, this can also vary from mild to severe.

There are online tests you can take, which I must add are only a first pointer before seeking a professional diagnosis.  Also, you may have had a child, niece or nephew recently diagnosed and noticed similarities with yourself.

There are professionals/psychologists in the UK that can diagnose adults, although I believe this not to be the case in Ireland, as is the same with qualifications. There are many that work in this field, in particular those that are qualified Fitness Trainers (gross motor), OT and SPLT and there are many that support academic areas such as dyslexia, dysgraphia and dyscalculia. You can contact us for advice and names of professionals who work in these areas; we have contacts across several countries.

Dyspraxia affects basic motor skills… gross (such as walking or sitting upright) and fine motor skills which include many things (such as writing or picking up small objects) in children as well as adults. Balance is a major factor and this can cause problems trying to put socks on unless we are seated, Doing up shirt buttons (start from one end, never in the middle), lifting a leg to wash our feet in the  shower. This is something that will last for life and it is recognised by many international organisations, including the WHO.

As an adult we find that DCD can affect so many things… learning to drive, dancing, playing sport, further education, employment and even relationships.

This can be as a result of being over anxious, frightened of failure and through a general lack of self-belief/confidence and also through poor organisation skills.

It can also bring about language problems and this can be exacerbated through increased anxiety or pressure.  We can often throw out random words or indeed full sentences and can also have problems with voice control including volume, speed and pitch.  We also have a tendency to interrupt others and often have to apologise for cutting in on conversations (due to slow processing speed).

Those who have, or think they have, dyspraxia, may also have other conditions.  You may have heard of co-morbidity… this means one thing existing alongside another… such as ASD, speech (verbal dyspraxia - dragging, stuttering or slurring), maths (dyscalculia) dyslexia and dysgraphia, sensory processing disorder, ADD or ADHD.

Having dyspraxia as an adult can cause depression and anxiety as we tend to get frustrated over things you feel should be easily achieved.  There are very good occupational therapists that can help you get around something, including most life skills… Yoga is also great for reducing stress and at the same time improving your balance and co-ordination. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy can also be of benefit.

Dyspraxia does not affect intelligence levels and I am afraid to say it never goes away, but we can learn how to cope with it.  If you think you may have dyspraxia or you might be following this up through your family line as it is often present or can run in families, first check with your GP and you can also contact an educational Psychologist or OT that specialises in dyspraxia.  In Ireland you can check with the Psychological Society of Ireland. If you are in the United States we have contacts over there that can provide further details.

Dyspraxia is relatively new when compared to dyslexia, however new research is coming to the fore, which is leading to improved diagnosis and the availability of resources.  It’s an area well worth keeping an eye on so you are up to date with the disorder.

Please note all our articles are for guidance only and we always recommend that you seek professional advice.

This work may contain some of the research of others and our opinions based on personal experience.

Dyslexia Toby © 2014

Why Does Telling The Time Fly Past Me? by Dyslexia Toby © 2014

Why do some of us find it difficult to tell the time? The big problem with the analogue clock is we work in two directions… away from the vertical and back to the vertical. This is very much the same as reading a compass; in fact many will stand facing north to make sense of the compass. This is also very similar to map reading… many will turn the map facing in the direction which they are headed.
Why is this such a problem for many? Mirroring is so often the problem… in fact laying a clock in front of the learner is sometimes easier than getting them to look at it vertically as it hangs on the wall.
Dyscalculia very much comes into play and with its difficulty in grasping numeric and general comprehension of mathematics, including understanding numbers… this is a problem that gets in the way of telling the time. In order to have any success in learning to tell the time, a child needs to be able to count up to 30. There are also the reversing processes (minutes past and to) which are used in telling the time. It also requires the processing of movement and often the differing words (after or past, before or to) can hinder the student as they may also have dyslexia.

You might find that starting with a toy clock, or forgetting the past and to the hour at the start and work on minutes from the hour, like thirty five minutes past twelve rather than twenty five to one, is a good introduction.
Dyscalculia can occur in around 5% of the population and this is far reaching and would affect many with a high IQ range. For some, this can cause problems with time, measurement and mirroring. Some say that around 1-2% of those with dyscalculia can have ADHD… this could cause problems with the need to focus whilst learning. Therefore, it is important that teaching the time is done in smaller, bite-sized chunks rather than trying to teach the whole concept in one go. As always, remember to allow at least 4 times longer for children with specific learning needs to grasp the concept… ie. overlearning. In a family where only one child has a learning need, it is particularly important not to benchmark them against their siblings when learning something new, ie. riding a bike, tying shoelaces, telling the time, etc. It’s worth noting that many of us have one or more learning difficulties (co-morbid), and this along with processing speed can slow progress in learning complex tasks.
We are pleased to announce that we are the distributors of the very latest clocks that can make learning the time much easier. In 3 simple steps your child will easily learn to tell the time on an analogue clock
Digital time is much easier to grasp, however there won’t always be a digital clock around.
Time telling and being aware of time is an important part of organisational skills, which we all need to master.
We have great resources for thse with dyscalculia, why not check out our online store…we ship to any country.

Our posts are for guidance purposes only and professional advice should also be sought.

T

Top  Anger Management (part three) - Inside the mind of the angered and angry child
Dyslexia Toby© 2014

What happens when a meltdown occurs (understanding helps reduce severity in the long term)is very important and the key is to reduce its longevity…it can be over in seconds or could take hours, depending on how it’s handled. One method is to try and be neutral in your emotional approach. Unstable reactions to an individual’s behaviour cause the situation to become more volatile. Emotion may give you feelings of being in free fall (lacking control). This will undoubtedly affect and may even frighten your child, this again could lead to a flight or fight situation leading to a point of no return
This may also lead to a permanent belief that your child has the upper hand and may encourage regular conflict as direct connection, albeit strained communication, is made between child and parent/carer.
Save the emotion for times when you want to reinforce positive behaviour, and then pour it on. When dealing with negative behaviour, try to stay unemotional and matter-of-fact. Quite often energy is found and it’s not unlike fuelling a fire. You are far better stifling the conflict by not reacting and you may well find the temper tantrum will simmer far quicker than you being verbally reactive…save that for promoting good behaviour.
Try to be more proactive, and less reactive. The best way to handle bad behaviour (and now I might be guilty of stating the obvious) is not to let the opportunity to arise in the first instance and moreso with children with specific educational needs, as their understanding of good and bad behaviour is far different than that of a fully able child. Looking at bad behaviour and then reflecting on the problems that led up to the event is a very worthwhile opportunity to prevent a repeat occurrence.
I often use a reflective diary during tuition with students/parents who come to me…get them to reflect on their day…good and bad (don’t worry about the information being legible). It’s very important to allow your child to communicate and at the same time allowing him/her to download information and switch off and relax/sleep easier at night.
One other thing you could do is use a colour coded week planner to identify the things your child likes to do and things they don’t like to do…encourage positivity by using their favourite colour for the things they least like to do and their least favourite colour for the things they like to do (reverse psychology)…image with specific educational needs children is everything.
Try keeping a reflective diary yourself and log down all of the immediate activities that led up to the meltdown. This will allow you to plan for the future and at least remove some of the events that lead to your child getting confused, then frustrated and then angry…things can then start to become a lot more fun and reduce stress levels in all quarters and there will a be a far more positive feel/bond between you and your child which will improve their social skills too.
Remember listen to every statement your child makes, as you might be agreeing to something that you will come to regret and promise nothing unless you intend to deliver on your promises. Time is another big thing…allow more time and try not to be late as again this can cause meltdowns.
Try to limit change…painting bedrooms , changing room layouts, etc…even changing the car should be gradual as children with specific educational needs enjoy stability and, believe me, they notice far more than you give them credit for…even seating arrangements whilst eating at home or even dining out are so very important to stop your child from feeling isolated or indeed the opposite... suffocated.
Please remember this information was based on parental experience…teaching and researching the work of others and should only be used as a guide.
I hope you have enjoyed reading these 3 posts on Anger Management and we look forward to posting more items on Specific Learning Needs.
Toby Lee Dyslexia  © Follow us on facebook at dyslexia dublin

Anger Management continued part two gaining an insight into the frustrated mind
By Dyslexia Toby © 2014

Weak Cognitive Connections: Children with Processing disorders and other specific cognitive impairments ADHD Asperger’s/Autism may not understand events in the same way others do or indeed the way they tend to react to commands and some portrayed moments are quite different to their able peers. We who have an immediate responsibility and indeed onlookers need to determine to gain strong understanding of the child or adults thought process before and during any (melt down) uncomfortable event. Many less able might not even show outward signs of distress and this needs to be closely monitored but may still leave them with an inward feeling of discomfort. Quite often the situation leads the child to believe it is a fight or flight situation…this is the opposite of where we appear to be most of the time (Parasympathetic) certainly in the main with able children/adults …in most cases children do not sense they are moving into the Sympathetic nervous state…we adults always see this first and its often the way we react that can infuse or defuse the situation.
Children and some Adults might mirror your reaction taken from a previous outburst (monkey see monkey do)used in a previous/similar situation…they don’t always understand how they should respond at their own age range and in turn can be colourful and graphical and use swear words they don’t fully understand and they will struggle to understand an Adult reaction and comment on their behaviour (if met with an adult response from a child…don’t react by giving an adult response)?.

Talking through anything needs to be specific, but put over in a very simple way; quite often a graphical approach will be the way forward as it is very often difficult for the child to understand the spoken word (flashcards are good) also emotions cards. We need to filter what images and words are within the auditory or visual reach of our children as most things are taken quite literally. If they witness a plane crash in the paper or on the news they might be reluctant to go on holidays if a plane is part of the travel arrangements.

Students with learning needs might be able to well require a different type of approach/supports to maybe their able siblings; this will largely depend on the individual’s level of maturity. Many students are able to process discipline, while others have specific deficits in this area. Some will take what you say to the letter even if you are only trying to get your point across with some degree of exaggeration.
Be careful when giving traumatic news to children with learning needs and also explain events they might witness (car accident etc.) in away appertain to the child’s age or level of maturity as this might be a degree below their chronological age...

Many children have difficulties with their level of social prowess, and may need far greater instruction anger management…levels of tolerance to movement, noise etc. will vary hugely and good communication is paramount as in all cases of managing anger and tolerance of things that are initially out of the control of the individual concerned. It is so important to take the approach as Rome was not built in a day and all this will take considerably longer…also be careful when looking back to the way you where parented as communications amongst many things has changes so much.

Our posts are for guidance purposes only and professional advice should also be sought .

Anger Management and specific leaning needs by  Dyslexia Toby  Part one 2014 ©

It is quite difficult for those who are fully abled to react to change, so how can we expect our children with known learning difficulties be the ...same as us?… we can’t is the short answer.
They struggle, as we are aware, to deal with or learn most everyday tasks.
So what causes the anxiety that quickly becomes frustration and, if not tempered, a meltdown?
Our children are constantly watching us, even though we rarely realise this is happening…it’s almost a subconscious act…so possible issues that may cause initial anxiety are:
Economically related (changes in routine due to tightening of funds) different supermarket…reducing happy time out…Mc Donalds, Cinema, etc.
You could be pre-occupied with issues – money, bills, separation, loss, for example.
Changing the car…and even the different colour of new purchase.
Changes to routine… eg. bed time or getting up early due to changes in logistics.
Change of environment…eg. bedroom…furniture being moved…places at dinner table…changing colour schemes…lighting colour…room fresheners…perfume…tooth brush. Yes, even a tooth brush can change moods.
Hairdresser…swimming pool…holiday destination.
Changes at school…new teachers…new classroom and new lesson content or subjects.
Children pick up far more than we realise and react to far more too…they can have a variation of triggers that can tip the scales, like aggressive sounding words, images stored from a previous incident (rather like deja vu), sounds, weather (icy, slippery), that can signal raised levels of anxiety or a rapid change to their feelings of being safe and feeling secure. These can be completely individual and not all of the above will have the same outcome/effect on each child. They will harbour some of these from past events and personal experience and they can also be associated with traumatic events in the past. Also, seeing fear in adults can make them link back through stored feelings and images (not unlike a nightmare in our sub conscious).
Children tend to present us with advanced warning of their unease in regard to these trigger events, warning signals that adults should realise are a precursor to understanding the child might be struggling or finding something very hard to come to terms with. These cues may include facial expressions or nervous tics (mild self-harm) pinching flesh, changes in speech patterns (incoherent or alterations in volume), hot when you are cold…sweating, feeling ill (stomach aches), becoming quiet or withdrawn (introvert…staying in one room), complaining or getting irritable, exhibiting lack of interest in going places, fear avoidance tactics, ie. negative responses when they were normally acceptable (shopping…swimming…Cinema). I recently witnessed a child being very uncomfortable with the noise of the ice crunching machine in a coffee shop…did the parent/carer spot the unease of the child....?
All of our posts are based on personal…family and research sourced in many places…and is for reading and guidance purposes. Part two to follow soon!


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‘When Is The Right Time To Tell Your Child They Have A Specific Learning Need?’ by  DyslexiaToby © 2014

Is there ever going to be a right time?  Well, you will always blame yourself for telling your child or indeed not as the case may be.  I can say from my own experience I would have loved to have known that I had a learning need, but back in the fifties and sixties there was no such diagnosis.  With dyspraxia, however, the first mention in the medical journals was as far back as 1962, although there was little heed paid to this and many other learning needs.  I spent my early life being very confused and angry at my lack of academic and sporting ability, I was constantly measured against my more able siblings and called many horrible things, including a word I despise to this day (‘spa’ or ‘spastic’).  I am far happier now that I had a reason for the problems I continually came across in the early years and it was out of my control and was deemed to be the way I would go on through life from birth.

Genetics sets the seed with most specific learning needs and this is the case for so many others… I am not alone!

You may have had a diagnosis, or be in the very early stages of wondering why your child is behaving or learning differently to others and you may be starting to suspect something is not quite right.  They may well be slow at hitting milestones and you may have also spotted the early signs of a specific learning difficulty.  I will say at this point, having dyspraxia myself and also for children with dyspraxia, I wouldn’t despair, as we go on to achieve great things and, if shown the right way, excel both physically and academically… we are great social animals too!

 What about those that are just late starters?  Many children find a variation in both physical and visual stimuli.  Some like to watch you, or programmes, also some watch and listen to conversations… these are usually the early readers.  Some like to construct and by this I mean those who show a preference to play with toys and build things… these are for the most part late/later readers.  As mentioned, it’s what pushes our buttons that drives us from the start.

You can never be too early to encourage both forms of stimuli and your engagement in this process will lead to your child joining in.

It is so important to work with the school or college on this, the more eyes the better.  You need to keep a very close eye on their academic work… teachers are being forced to teach ever larger class sizes than ever before and don’t always get chance to check every piece of homework and quite often the students will cross mark each other’s work… this can result in them falling behind.  Don’t forget the square of over teaching - those with a learning need may require a more graphical description of what has to be learnt compared to a child who has no SPLD… quite often 2-3 or 4 times longer.

Make sure you keep your concerns written down with times and dates… this comes in really handy to monitor progress, take to open days, parents evenings and IEP meetings (individual education plan). Never discard this information as you can use it when your child steps up in that, or a new, school… not all teachers inform each other of someone leaving their class to move to another, even though you might take this for granted.

Always check school reports and note discrepancies from teacher to teacher and subject to subject… the problem more often than not is in the core and language subjects.  Be positive, proactive and constructive with your child’s school/teacher, aggression often meets aggression… suggestions and inducing suggestions from others tends to yield positive results.

If you have no diagnosis, ask the school or college as they have funds for this, although I will say they are extremely limited and have to be used wisely.

Try and benchmark progress and always leave a meeting with a date for the next review, this leaves nothing to chance which is important because, as we all know, the years flow quickly by.

Keep your child informed, they often resent going to resource when they are older, especially boys.  Try and keep their confidence high by talking about their great efforts in other areas.

Kinesthetic learning is so often the way forward and it’s important to work at the point where the wheels fell of rather that at the coal face.  By the time the school and maybe your concerns are heard, the child will be at least eighteen months behind… so imagine putting a second class student into fourth class, how would they feel?  That is the way your child feels every day.

Look for tell-tale signs like stammer/stutters, keeping themselves isolated during school and maybe they have no interest in inviting friends over, they avoid the competitive aspects of school (sports, etc.).  Maybe they have moved up a year and the new teacher gets them to read aloud to the class and this is bothering them, the dreaded Friday spelling test or other tests like the STEN, SATS or Drumcondra… maybe you can reflect after reading this and remember episodes of reluctance or faking a day off and see a common link.

Above all, support from all moves this forward and if you haven’t told your child about your worries, there is a good chance school friends or even a teacher might have… not always directly, but your child will read between the lines.

If you have a diagnosis and a statement you are entitled to an IEP, ask your SENCO/SNA or the principal and if you haven’t had one, drive it forward… I have written articles on the IEP which you can read either on Facebook or on my blog (www.dyslexiadublin.blogspot.ie).

Some may try to convince you that you should be under a recognised group/umbrella group, either independent or recognised by the government, to obtain resource… this is not the case, all you need is a statement.  Whilst some will be happy to kick the problem down the road, many will go the extra mile… I know several schools that support struggling learners through extra resource and they don’t have a statement.

When you are doing homework, start as soon as they are home from school and make sure they drink plenty of water, hydration is a key to focus and, whilst on the subject, check that they can drink fresh water whilst in class too.  Frontload all study and taper down towards the end of the session, leave plenty of time to relax and help the processing… remember the rule of four!

 It’s worth focussing on the positive sides of your child in or out of school… this alone will move them forward and they will find their plateau.  You as a parent will get your reward from seeing that happy child you always knew you had!  They are not lazy, clumsy or stupid… we just process in a very different way and we all get there in the end!  We just need to reinforce this constantly as low self-esteem and confidence is a peril we would rather avoid.

Have a read of another article of mine related to this subject –

The Why’s and How’s of the IEP:

http://www.dyslexiadublin.blogspot.ie/2013/04/the-whys-and-hows-of-iep-individual.html

 NB. This information is from our personal experience and research of our extensive team and also partly sourced through the work of others. It is purely for improving the understanding of dyslexia and other specific learning needs and to offer help and advice only. Dyslexia Toby © 2014 

Contact us at www.dublin-cetc.com or through twitter dyslexiadublin